A late reply can make your mind race. Or you may like someone, then pull away the closer they get.
It is tempting to say, “This must be because of my mom.”
That is too simple.
Anxiety and avoidance can show up in different ways
Early relationships can shape how safe closeness feels. But friends, partners, stress, and life experience matter too.
Someone who feels anxious may worry more about rejection. Someone who avoids closeness may need space when things feel intense.
Neither label tells the whole story of a person.
One thing to try in your relationship
Separate facts from the story your mind adds.
“The reply came three hours later” is a fact. “They are leaving me” is an interpretation.
Try asking for what you need plainly: “When you are busy, could you send a quick message? It helps me relax.”
Attachment is not a verdict. Noticing one pattern you want to change is already a beginning.